Back to the blog...

Ugh...Things have been so busy lately. Work is busy, and so much to do and not enough hours in the day. I know, I am sure I am preaching to the choir...

Mom has been up and down since the service. Sometimes she gets so agitated, they give her a sedative, which, before the memorial service, would just barely calm her down. Now they seem to hit her like I have always thought they should. The sad thing is, they make her calmer, and a little slower, but she says all the same things to me as she does when she is lucid...Just slower and quieter. She is still really struggling with everything. She really wants to smoke, so I finally gave in and bought her a pack of cigs to smoke only when I am there...Half the time, she goes out, takes two puffs and says she needs to go back inside because it is too cold. I still think that the smoking agitates her further when she starts getting the nicotine withdrawals, but now that I have let her smoke, there is no stopping her. I am hoping that she doesn't get kicked out of Magnolia at some point for being so belligerent. Ugh! I curse that person who got her that pack of cigarettes!!! No one at the nursing home will admit to it, and Mom won't reveal the culprit.

Anyway, she continues to have a hard time dealing with life itself. Thanks to everyone for coming to visit her. I know it is hard to see sometimes, but she does enjoy your company. Often, in the few moments of peace and calm she and I sometimes have during our visits, she will talk about how nice it was to see each of you.

I hope all is well with each of you, and I hope you have wonderful plans for this beautiful weekend!:)

Much love.

A truly wonderous day...

What an amazing day! It was beautiful, albeit a little warmer than I had expected, but the service was just a wonderful thing!

It went exactly as planned, and I was so touched by things that I didn't know would impact me the way they did.

As I looked out into the seats as I spoke my tribute to my Father, I saw faces, both familiar and not, sometimes smiling, sometimes crying, but most of all, united in a celebration of a man who proved that life is worth living, no matter what.

I will admit it, the bagpiper hit me harder than I ever thought possible. But it was so wonderfully beautiful. She later came up to me and gave me her condolences, and told me what an honor it was to play. What a blessing, and what a wonderful sentiment.

Mom struggled when I got her there in the morning, but as people started to arrive, and she calmed down enough to look around at the memory tables, she ended up being able to say hello to everyone. All in all, she was happy and proud of the service I put together.

I can't thank everyone enough for attending, and I hope each and every person there had as good a time as possible for a memorial service, because Dad loved a party, and this would have been no exception!

One more thank you to everyone, for your love, support, donations, cards, hugs, sentiments, emails, phone calls and more. To be surrounded by such wonderful people is a blessing beyond dreams.

Much love!

Spent time with Mom last night.  She is having a really hard time, because in addition to everything else, her meds are all messed up.  They have put her on new ones, taken her off some, all with going in and out of the hospital.  So her body is really struggling to make sense of new meds and side effects as well as withdrawal from others.  It doesn't help her state of mind.

I have been getting everything in line for Tuesday.  I think it is going to be a lovely day.  Looking forward to seeing you all.

Much love!

And back to Grossmont...

Well, in the midst of our small Easter celebration, Mom started having chest pains...So, after taking her vitals and giving her some pain meds, they decided to send her back out to the hospital.  So, we spent Easter in the E.R., and she spent last night and tonight in a really great hospital room.  They did not find anything conclusive, but they want to keep her for observation anyway.  She is actually handling it kind of well.  She is still very itchy, and the Benedril does not work very long.  So, she is pretty uncomfortable, but trying her best.  She should head back to Magnolia tomorrow, unless something comes up.

I also want to post some more information about Dad's service next week.  In order to have everyone show up at the correct location please take the following directions...From the 5 Freeway, exit Sea World Drive and head West.  At the third traffic signal, S. Shores Park, turn right and follow the road down to the East Employee Parking entrance, and let them know you are there for the memorial service.  Please watch for children when parking, as there will be several Education groups arriving at the same time. 

The walk into the venue is about a 5-6 minute walk.  If there is anyone who may have problems or need assistance covering that distance, please contact me at 619-303-2027.

I hope every one had a lovely holiday.

Much love!

Back to Magnolia...

Well, Mom is back at Magnolia.  She was released from the afternoon today, and got back in time for dinner.

My poor Mom.  She is just having such a hard time with life.  She is just at the end of her rope.  She is really struggling with everything.  I am having such a hard time figuring out how to bring her any inkling of peace or joy.  Nothing I can say or do brings her any relief.  Even when she gets something she really wants, she somehow skips right over any pleasure, and goes onto whatever is the next thing she is fixated on.  I am hoping that getting back to Magnolia, and some structure may bring her a little comfort.  But she needs to make amends within herself, and make a decision to not be miserable.  I am just not sure how to facilitate that in her...It is just hard to sit by and watch her suffer.

I am fighting this dreadful cold that is going around.  If you haven't gotten it yet, take your vitamins and wash your hands...It is no fun.

Much love.

Another rough day for Dorth...

My poor Mom.  She is just so unhappy and frustrated.  Although, she may get released tomorrow.  As almost anyone could have predicted, the extra high dose of Coumadin finally kicked in, and today, her blood was critically thin.  So, first too thick, now too thin...Maybe tomorrow it will be "just right..."  If so, then she should be able to go back to Magnolia. 

Today was just a little rough.  I think she gets lonely when I have to work all day...Well, she doesn't have anyone to order around except the nursing staff, and they don't have time to constantly entertain her, or move her from the chair to the bed and back again all the time.  They really do have some wonderful, patient, friendly nurses at Grossmont.  Thank goodness.

Much love.

Dorothy is a hard nut to crack...

Leave it to my Mom...She is really upset because the Dr. told her she had to be in the hospital another 3 or 4 days.  They are testing her Coumadin levels, and although they are giving her a dose normally given to a 250 lb man, it is not thinning her blood.  the doctor is not quite sure what to do with her, so he is just going to keep watching her closely.  Mom is miserable there.  Although she had her feeding tube removed today, and she had our family friends Paula and Stephanie visit today, she is just so frustrated she has to stay there, not much breaks through that.  But she did tell me that she was good today...She behaved.  I hope she is right.;)

Much love!

Dad's obituary ran in today's paper.  To look at it online you can go to http://www.legacy.com/Link.asp?I=LS000125760435X.

Mom is having a really rough time in the hospital.  The doctor said she would be there until Tuesday or Wednesday.  They are waiting until the Coumadin levels in her blood are where they want them.  The Heparin, or Lovenox they are giving her will thin her blood, but will not dissolve the clot.  The Coumadin will break up the clot, but they can't risk doing it too quickly and loosening the clot.  She just has to be patient...Which is not really in her vocabulary any more.  She is really having a hard time with being confined to her room/bed, and she is driving the nurses quite crazy...So, pray for Mom and pray for the nursing staff...;)

Much love! 

Another twist on this roller coaster ride of life...

Well, today brought another opportunity to be grateful and realize just how fragile life is...Mom was doing her last covered day of PT and suffered painful breathing and tightness in her chest.  So, to be on the safe side, the nursing home called 911 to have her examined at the hospital.  And it is a good thing they did.  Mom suffered a pulmonary embolism, which for us lay people is a blood clot in her lung.  The blood clot is usually what they refer to as a deep vein thrombosis (DVT) and for many possible reasons, may form somewhere in the body and break loose and travel into the lung.  Pulmonary embolism causes sudden death in 26% of the cases, and is the third most common cause of death in the U.S.  These DVT's can also cause strokes and heart attacks.  

The treatment, since we caught it, is to try and dissolve the clot with blood thinners such as Heparin in the near term, and Coumadin for the long term.  So, we get rid of this clot (and any others that may be lurking) and keep the blood thin enough to prevent any future clots.  For those with PE that recover but continue to go untreated, about a third will die from another PE.  However, these blood thinners can prove to be an issue because if you cut yourself, it is very hard to stop the bleeding, because your blood won't clot.  It is a fine balance.

By the time I got to the hospital, Mom was acting like an irritated bee...They not only started an IV in her arm, they needed an IV with a large gauge for the CT scan contrast, so they put a IV in her neck...So, she was glad to see me, and I seemed to calm her a bit.  But she was demanding to make it back to Magnolia tonight, because she was convinced that my Dad's memorial service was tomorrow.  She has been convinced that his service was "tomorrow" for the past week or so.  I am sure she will get it in her head that the service is not "tomorrow" 2 days before...Because, then, it will be tomorrow.:)

She is in pretty good spirits, but she does not want to be in the hospital.  The ER doctor said she will probably be in a day or two, but her hospitalist said she may be in 4 or 5 days.  We just want to be sure she is as stable as possible before that happens.

On a good note, I got another chance to check out the gift shop!  I bought Mom a super cute hat, and a necklace for myself.  So, once again, the hospital gift shop has supplemented my wardrobe.  Small blessings...;)

Also, my Dad's obituary should be in the Sunday paper this week.  I will post the link to the UT website once I get it on Sunday.  But keep your eye out for it.

Much love.

The nicotine dilemma...

Mom and I had some great visits lately.  Saturday and Sunday were nice, and yesterday was really nice too.  She is still very sad, but stubborn.  I guess she keeps using the sympathy card with the other residents and staff and keeps bumming cigarettes.  So, she had one yesterday, and when I was over getting the mail today, there were 6 messages on the answering machine...All came in between 6:10 p.m. and 6:16 p.m. and they were all ordering me to bring her cigarettes RIGHT NOW, and threatening not to eat again until she gets them...Great, she is blackmailing me by holding a loved one hostage...It just happens to be her...Lovely.

So, as expected, they have officially discontinued Mom's PT...So, in amongst all the other stuff, now I tackle Sharp Healthcare once again ...Wish me luck.

Much love!