Thanksgiving blessings...

Today was quite a long day for both Mom and I. It started at Dr. Levi's office up at 9:00 am. Dr. Levi was glad to see Mom's eye is getting better, but is concerned that it is coming back slower than she had hoped. Once she learned of my Mom's cancer, she wants to keep a close eye on her, and work with the oncologist to keep apprised of Mom's situation. There is a chance that Mom just heals more slowly than average, but in case there is something else going on, she wants to keep her options open.

Mom also had her PET scan today. We won't get the results until Monday when we go see the oncologist. But at least it is over. The PET scan, or Positron Emission Tomography, uses an injected radioactive isotope to identify any cancer cells in the body. So, for the next 24 hours or so, Mom is radioactive...Mom asked the technician what that meant, and asked if she would blow up if she lit a cigarette...I answered a loud and resounding "YES!" The lab tech laughed and told her she indeed, would not. Oh well, A for effort on my part.

We also got the results to Dad's MRI today. The tumors are still there, but are much smaller, and much of the swelling is gone. Dr. Uhl said that this is very good, and on the right track. When I asked about the small tumor on the left, he said it is really very small and he is not really concerned much about it. He said that the radiation is still continuing to do it's job, and the chemo will help to continue to fight the cancer. All in all, he said this is good news. Still waiting for the results to the thyroid test...Guess it will be Monday until I can call again...Or better yet, I plan on finding the Dr. on Monday when Mom and I go see her Dr. at the Cancer Center. One of the main reasons I had Mom choose a different oncologist than Dad is because Dr. Zu's office does not communicate very well, and on more than one occasion does not return any calls to me or to the nursing home. That drives me crazy. I don't think the things I am asking for are unreasonable...But even if they are, some sort of acknowledgement would be appreciated.

So, Mom and I have been invited to my friend Stephanie's family Thanksgiving celebration. It will be nice to celebrate being thankful for our blessings, which include our friends and family especially this year, with those who have been by our sides throughout this year and always. We are going to follow that up with a visit with my Aunt and Uncle and the family, and then down to see Dad. All in all, it is proving to be a downright enjoyable day.

If I haven't adequately expressed my gratitude to all of the phone calls, emails, visits, well wishes, thoughts, prayers, cards, flowers, plants, hugs, smiles, meals, offers of rides, housecleaning, food, and my personal favorite..."Anything," I cannot think of a better day to close my eyes and feel the wave of love and friendship we have been blessed with these last 6 months. I have said in the past, one of the things I pride myself on in life is being a good friend, and surrounding myself with good friends...Good, strong, loyal, caring, thoughtful friends, a trait I learned from my Dad. I am also lucky to have been blessed with family with all of these qualities as well. I have always known how special those close to me are, but I still marvel everyday at the seemingly unending support of all of those special people in our lives. From lifelong friends, family, my co-workers, my Dad's co-workers, our dentists and their amazing staff..I could go on and on...And on. In all that has happened this year, and is still yet to come, I am so thankful for your love and support, and presence in our world. Thank you so much for all you do, for me, for my Mom, and my Dad.

The Reed's are eternally grateful for each and every one of you.

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday, and may your Black Friday hold amazing deals, if you choose to partake...:)

Much love to all!

Little joys...

So, at work, when someone on my team at work has a birthday, we have a lunch, complete with some sort of dessert. I like to bake, so I sometimes make something, usually cupcakes. So, when August said he would be interested in red velvet cupcakes. I have never had red velvet cupcakes or even cake. It is a rich, sweet cake, stemming from the deep south. It used to be made with beets, but now is made with red food coloring.

Well, I found a recipe online and began the endeavor to make them from scratch. Other than red stains on my hands from the food coloring, in just about 3 hours time, I was able to mix, bake and frost 36 of these red beauties.

They went over well at the birthday lunch, and although they didn't turn out to be my favorite kind of cake, the dense consistency, sweet cream cheese frosting and bright red color were a hit with the group.

The reason I tell you this is because I took the remaining dozen down to Magnolia to give them to the nurses and CNA's that take good care of my Dad. I try to take something to say thank you every week or two. I did hold pull one aside for my Dad.

Well, Dad ate almost half of his cupcake (which is a lot for him these days), and I haven't seen him so pleased with anything in over a month. He kept saying it was "so good it was unbelievable." Then he would say "It is so good, I am not even sure it is real.." And before I left he told me he was proud of me...Now, of course I love it when my Dad says he's proud of me, even if is over a little red cake, but it was more about the way he said it...Not as much about whether or not he is actually proud of me, but to see him be that pleased with anything just made my heart sing. It was truly a good night.

Tomorrow is the MRI that will tell us what is truly going on inside my Dad's skull. Is the radiation and chemo working? Is the tumor the same? Bigger? Smaller? Gone altogether? What are the next steps? More treatments? What is in store. I am hoping for some sort of results on Wednesday. I am also anxious to see the results of the thyroid test. Because regardless of what is going on upstairs, if his thyroid is not working right, and can be helped with simple medication, then it will improve his quality of life significantly.

Wednesday is a big day for Mom. We go see the neuro-opthomologist in the morning and then her PET scan in the afternoon. We then go see the oncologist on Monday, and we will know more about the next steps for her.

Oh, and I also got word today that the HOA has decided to repair my breached sewer line. Of course this includes the jackhammering of my kitchen tile and a foot of concrete, only after I have completely packed up my entire kitchen, and stored it elsewhere...I have to wait for the plumber to call me and schedule all of this, but at least it is in the works.

Keeping the faith, thinking good thoughts, and practicing patience...:)

Love to all!

Digging deep...

Well, yesterday was the Doppler test for Dad, and the Thanksgiving celebration at Magnolia.

The Doppler ultrasound test went ok, it caused Dad some pain when they used the wand on a few parts of his legs. I am not sure what the official results are, but Mom said that they found his circulation was a little slow in the leg most effected by Polio...Big shocker there.

The dinner was pretty nice. They set up tables throughout Magnolia, and there were quite a few guests who came to spend a nice evening dinner with the residents. The food wasn't too bad, and they had live piano playing in two of the rooms. It was a little hectic, but quite enjoyable. Dad had a bit of a hard time because he originally wanted to sit outside, and then he got too cold, and by that time, all the tables were full. So, Mom, Dad and I sat in his room and squeezed in around his little bed table and ate together. Well, Mom and I ate, and Dad didn't. But it was nice to be together and be grateful for all our blessings.

Today was a bit of an ordeal. I met Dad down at the Cancer Center, and when the transportation person arrived with Dad, he had a silver dollar-sized bruise on his shoulder near his neck, and the skin was torn. I know as Dad gets older, his skin is thinner, but this was awful. It didn't seem to bother him much, but it just looks ghastly. From what I can tell, the guy that transported him either tethered him in wrong or too tight. I had the nurses make sure they cleaned it out and put a bandage on it. It just breaks my heart bedause I feel like if I had more time I could have prevented it....Not sure how, but I must have been able to do something to protect him.

And then at the appointment with Dr. Zu, Dad's temperature was 96.1 degrees! I asked the doctor again (I had asked him last appointment) why he is so cold, and he said "well, I can check his thyroid." When I got back to my computer, I looked up what hypothyroidism can cause...And my heart sank. It can cause low body temperature, lack of appetite, extreme drowsiness and fatigue, and even neurological problems like pins and needles and nerve pain...All of which Dad has been experiencing for the past few months. I am so frustrated...I have been asking the nurses and the doctors for weeks why he is experiencing these symptoms, and all I got was "I don't know." Including Dr. Zu. I am hopeful that it is his thyroid, because that can be treated with a pill and should solve or improve a majority of his problems. I am just heartbroken that he has had to endure being so cold, and not enjoy eating, and so drowsy that he missed out on visits with Jay, Paula, Lynn, Jay, Stacy, Jan, Jerry, Mary, Dennis and more.

It just makes me realize that no one, not even the doctors, are focused on my Dad. They do the protocol, what they are supposed to do...Dad is just a number. I don't know why I thought things were different, but it just reminds me that I have to stay on top of them all and push and fight, and make sure they don't write my Dad off. I am so sick of hearing "oh, that is just how the disease progresses." That may be the case, but that is not an excuse not to do everything possible to make whatever time he has left, a month, 6 months, 6 years or 60 years, worth living. This whole thyroid thing makes me feel like I have let him down somehow because I didn't push more. I know I shouldn't feel that way, but I have to take that in and remember so that I do my best not to let anything like that happen again.

We go for his MRI on Tuesday, and that will tell us a lot. And you can bet, no matter what it says, I will continue to fight for my Dad.

Have a great weekend...Love to all.

Busy couple of days for Dad...

I am hoping that a couple trips out of Magnolia will help to give Dad a boost. Tomorrow, he is going to Grossmont Hospital for a Doppler Ultrasound on his legs. They have been swollen, and he is always cold, so the house Dr. is worried about his circulation. He has always had some trouble with his circulation in his legs because of the polio, but it seems to have gotten worse. I think it is simply because he rarely gets out of bed...He doesn't move around too much, and I think that has a lot to do with it. Tomorrow evening is Thanksgiving at Magnolia. They have a turkey dinner for the residents and 2 members of their family, so Mom and I are going to be there for turkey with Dad. Then on Friday, Dad goes to see Dr. Zu for a checkup.

Mom went for her lung function test yesterday. They put you in an airtight booth, put a clip on your nose and put this apparatus in your mouth. It measures your lung capacity and how much air you can fill your lungs with, how much you exhale, etc. I guess we will get the results from Dr. Bodkin when we go to see him on the first of December. She still has to do the PET scan sometime in the next week or so.

Also, next week, Dad goes in for his MRI, and Mom goes back to see the neuro-opthomologist as well.

Just keeping it all together...:) Hope you are all doing the same.

Love to all.

Promising day...

Well, we met with the oncologist for Mom today. We don't know much more than we did yesterday, but the news is promising. The tumor is 2.2 centimeters, about as big around as a nickel. Mom will do a PET scan sometime in the next 2 weeks, and if you remember from my Dad, the PET scan is kind of like an MRI, but they inject a different kind of contrast that clings to cancer cells and shows up by glowing. Dr. Bodkin wants to be sure that this tumor is isolated and has not spread. I guess there are some spots on her liver that are suspect, but Dr. Bodkin thinks that they are just cysts, and the PET scan will (hopefully) show that these are indeed, just cysts. The Dr. that did the biopsy, didn't think that the lymph nodes in the chest were involved, but once again, we are hoping that the PET scan will confirm this.

Once we determine the extent of the cancer, there are a multitude of different treatments. If all goes well, and it is isolated, (which is best case scenario and what we are hoping for), then there is a possibility of surgery to remove it, a couple less invasive treatments using a hot probe or a cold probe to destroy the tumor, and a radiation treatment that targets the tumor specifically.

In addition to the PET scan, the Dr. wants to do a lung function test to see if Mom is even a candidate for surgical removal if that is an option.

These tests are to be completed in the next 10-14 days and we go back on December 1st to discuss next steps.

Mom is pleased with the news, and I (being a little paranoid as of late) am remaining cautiously optimistic for now.

Dad continues to be very very tired. He is awake, and knows we are there, but doesn't really open his eyes. He listens to everything and if I ask him a question, he will answer. But most of the time, he just lays there with his eyes closed. We see the oncologist on Friday, and then he gets the long awaited MRI next week. Hopefully, good or bad, it will help explain some of his symptoms.

It has been a long day...It included buying my Mom a new artificial Christmas tree, which when I got it home and put it up, the lights didn't work...And my "Check Engine" light came on...But all in all, as frustrating as the little things are, I am still holding hope that today's news about Mom is as good as it seems.

Love to all!

It should get easier....

So, I have had enough practice lately, but receiving and repeating it just doesn't get easier.

So, we got confirmation on something this week that we were hoping would go a different way. My Mom has lung cancer.

We don't really know much at this point, but we go to the oncologist next week, who can tell us more. What we do know, is that it is one of the non-small types of lung cancer, and the mass they are looking at is about the size of a shooter marble. Other than that, we have to wait to talk to the oncologist.

Needless to say, we are overwhelmed, scared, anxious...Everything you would imagine.

We are not telling Dad, as he does not need anything to worry him. Dad seems to be doing ok. Very sleepy, as usual, but seems to be in good spirits.

I will keep everyone posted on everything as we learn more...

Love to all.

Just a peek...

Well, there is a little bright spot on the horizon...Well, brighter for some...One in particular. Mom's left eyelid is starting to open a little. I noticed it today, but she said she really started to notice it yesterday. The eyeball is slowly coming back as well, but it is still primarily shifted to the left, so when her eyelid does open ever so slightly, she is still seeing double. So, she may need to go back to the eyepatch if it bothers her too much. Although it is driving her crazy, I think I have her understanding that this is really good news.

I did see Dad for a few minutes tonight. Again, very sleepy. But, the CNA said he was up in his wheelchair this afternoon, and he is still on his chemo doses. So he probably needs the sleep so his body can recover.

Well, we seem to be on an upswing this week...I am just hoping it continues!:)

Much love!

Keepin' on keepin' on...

So, Dad was good this past week and this weekend. He is very tired...Sleepy is a better description. I think it is probably the chemotherapy. His appetite is also dwindling. He just doesn't want to eat...I am hoping it is the chemo as well.

Dad goes for his MRI on November 25th. This will tell us how the treatments are working. I am looking foreward to seeing how things are looking.

Other than that, things are going ok...And back to work tomorrow!

Hope all is well with everyone...:)

Much love!

Hope you exercised your right to vote today!

I hope everyone got their votes in for what they believe in...But I have to say...I AM SO GLAD IT IS OVER! The people have spoken...So now let's get rid of the signs and ads and all of those folks who think others are eager to listen to their unrequested opinion...I love this country, I love the freedom of speech, but somehow, what politics turns some people into is just exhausting. There...You got my unrequested opinion!:)

Mom and I went down to see Dad this evening. I had baked some cupcakes for a couple birthdays at work , so I made some extra to take to the staff at Magnolia. They really appreciated it.

Dad was actually pretty good tonight. He was still confused, but he seemed so much clearer, and alert. The past few nights, he has seemed so tired...Even keeping his eyes closed while eating. But tonight, he just seemed so much more with it. Laughing, cracking jokes, and just...Well, present. It was a nice change. As you can imagine, all of this takes a toll on us, and just a glimmer of a good day for Dad makes it easier.

Much love!