Today brought some pseudo sleep for Mom. At least I think it did. I spent a few hours with her this morning, and although her eyes were open, I do believe she was getting some much needed rest.

Her vitals were lower today, but, I think they were borderline on "too" low. Her heart rate was down around 78, and her blood pressure was like 72/41. They were doing their best to keep her stable. She did perk up a little in the afternoon, and she was repeating her paranoid stories from yesterday to my Aunt. She was not insisting on the ice chips like she was yesterday, and she had shifted a bit thinking she was at home. Just taking one day at a time...

I have systematically run into most of the doctors who treated her when she went in for her eye in December, and Dr. Zu, my Dad's oncologist, and then this afternoon, the doctor that performed the carotid surgery on Mom in October. When I told him what had happened, he went in and looked at her records, and came in to tell me that her carotids looked good. He was afraid something had happened with what he had worked on. He is a good doctor, pretty cocky though. He was actually quite sympathetic, and said he would come back and see her when she was awake...Boy was she bummed she slept through seeing the "handsome" doctor!

I did see Dad for about 20 minutes...I was there over an hour, but he fell asleep.:)

Today was a bit more of a struggle for me. As time passes, the level of emotion waxes and wanes...I am sure it is all normal...But I do know what they mean when they say you have the "weight of the world on your shoulders," because I do. When I get up in the morning, my arms feel so heavy that they almost feel that they will pull from their sockets, and that my shoulders are being pulled so hard by gravity. But hey, if I make it out of bed in the morning, I have conquered the first of the day's battles! Thank goodness for the tremendous love and support that surrounds me...I have heard the saying "it takes a village," but I always thought it referred to raising a child, not me...:) Either way, I am a lucky girl to have what I have, and who I have.

Much love and hope.