What is time?

6 months...Just a blink in time...But yet an eternity.  Today is 6 months since the passing of my wonderful, strong, kind, brilliant Father.  Not a day goes by that I don't mourn his loss or weep that my life is somehow less without him.  Yes, I attend my self-pity party on a regular basis, and although this Earth is less without him as well, I was lucky enough to be his daughter.  He was my hero, my teacher, my mentor...He taught me patience, tolerance, how to love, learn and right my wrongs.  To stand up for myself, to value each and every day, to appreciate the gifts and challenges that everyday brings.  Because we only get one chance at this life.

One chance...This is it...One time, one body, one mind.  No one glides through perfectly...There are bumps and bruises and devastating tragedies.  But, on the flip side, there are joys...So many joys.  Amazing people, amazing moments, amazing things to see, hear, taste, touch, feel, sense, ponder, create, appreciate, improve, invent.  And I think we can learn from it all.

Many people were afflicted with Poliomyelitis...A death sentence in some cases, paralysis in 1% of the cases, and 90% of the cases, there were no symptoms at all.  A promising young athlete, following in his father's footsteps, plays football one evening, unable to walk the next day...This story could have ended badly.  So many people would give up, lose the will to fight, finally get so tired and frustrated and fall prey to self-pity and allow others to do things for them.  Not my Dad.

Edward "Scotchie" Reed not only never complained, or used it as any excuse, he also never took it for granted.  He used it to motivate him, to allow him to appreciate the things he learned, the things he accomplished, the mountains he climbed, the successes he achieved...Not only in spite of Polio, but, perhaps, because of it.

Yes, 6 months later, and I do my best to embody those qualities my Father so effortlessly exhibited, every single day of his life.  I try to be strong, not for him or Mom, but for myself.

Some people have told me that I am a lot like my Dad...A higher compliment I can barely fathom.  Time waits for no one.  Each day that passes is another day away from being able to hug my Dad, ask his opinion, see him smile, hear his laugh.  I still talk to him...Share sunsets, happy moments, funny moments, ask him to give me strength in weak moments...But, as with any loss of someone close, that ability to look that person in the eyes, tough their hand, feel their embrace, hear the sound of their voice the pain is real and constant.  The ache of want can be overwhelming at times.  But, in the spirit of my wonderful Dad, recognizing the pain, but not letting it take over...Allowing it to create the balance of life, is the key.  

As Joni Mitchell sang, "you don't know what you got 'til it's gone," it truly makes life richer and fuller when you make an effort to really look at what we are presented with in this world.  Amazing friends, beautiful vistas, tough love, silly dogs, and so many, many other personal things to each and every one of us...Make an effort to be present in your life in this world, because you just never know what it holds next.  

I love you Pop.  And much love to you all.